inside, outside, upside down.

Have you ever wanted to make something or someone just disappear?

Most parts of my life, I have no regrets. No desire to change how things ended up. I think this is one of the most healthy ways to life, specifically because to regret who choices you made, ultimately affects who you are, and if you like who you are, its counter productive. (yeah, I confused myself with that too)

There are however parts of my life, that I wish turned out differently. People that I wish I had stayed friends with, or not worked so hard at being friends with. Foods I wish I hadn't eaten, and others I wish I had eaten more of while I had the chance, you know, trivial things.

Learning to let go of the things you have no control over was one of the hardest lessons I ever taught myself. (that my father graciously helped with) This is one I wish I could write a manual on, and share with everyone I know - However the only way I can think to pass it along to those I care about is to offer some personal solutions that will eventually lead to being able to let go of the past.

Please, every day - Smile at yourself. Be kind to you, and gentle with your feelings. You hurt them more than anyone else ever could, and you need to take responsibility for that. You are the only one who can. No one is going to walk through your front door/into your office/into the grocery store, and change that for you. It happens, but so rarely that you really should decide that this is one you want to own.

Every day - Say something kind to strangers. They have the same suffrage/insecurities/sadnesses in themselves that you face every day. To take the time to maybe make just one persons day - is priceless. Do it tomorrow, and do it often. Forget it - when you go to the store tonight, do it then! Start right now.

Every day - Live in the now. Realize that yesterday is the past, and tomorrow is the future. Two things you can do nothing about at this very moment - all you HAVE is this very moment. Live in it. Be present. Act now.

Every day - Know that there are people who love you, even in the most unlikely of places. That pizza delivery boy? I bet he loves you. Your parents? Sure, you don't talk, but hell, they love you. Aunts, Uncles, Grandparents, Siblings. Yep. They love you. (they may not like you if you're not a nice person, but you can change that!)

Every day - Take the time to look around, and see the beauty in the otherwise chaos we call life. Big Metropolitan city, little country roads, the stores, the sidewalks, theres beauty there, you just have to find it. Sometimes you can see it on your own, sometimes something amazing has to happen and then everything is beautiful. Try to be conscious of when you see beauty, and then drink it in - all the way into your belly.

Every day - Learn something new. I personally like new words. I love to read books. I love to read blogs, see peoples insights on things that may not be my own.

These are a few steps I take every day. I have had my moments where things aren't the best. I have crawled, scraped and screamed my way out of them. I refuse to be kept down, I refuse to allow negativity to define me, and to change the way I am, because I am wonderful.

You are wonderful too! I know this, did you?

~me.